A Mystery

I am a planner. I have been since...hmm... well always. I like to have my ducks as much in a row as physically possible, I like to have an idea of what to expect in the future. I think this stems from having an anxiety disorder- order and planning make me just plain feel better. Chaos, flying by the seat of my pants and having no idea what to expect-- scare the crap out of me. Ha!

So imagine the whirl wind when we find out at the ultrasound...nothing! We find out there is a super cute baby in my tummy, we find out our dates are correct for expecting this little lovely but we do not find out if we are expecting a boy or a girl. I felt a little out of place, a little confused leaving the appointment. I really expected this to go as quickly as Dax's first ultrasound - first 10 seconds- Look, it's a ____.  Nope! Not to be this go around apparently.

This is so odd to me. I just can't get my head around how to plan for this baby. How to name a baby I can't say "yes, we're having a baby ___ and his/her name is ___." I will get over this, we will find two baby names and life will be just find and dandy but I just am not there yet. I haven't even brought up names up with Dustin except the occasional, "Dax thinks the baby should be Goldilocks" or "Dax and Gigi think Olive is a cute girls name." Which is both not serious and quite funny.

I did get the answer to my prayers though. I did pray that the ultrasound would show a healthy baby and it did. I remind myself of that daily. Our ultrasound this go around was "good" instead of finding an issue like Dax's 1st ultrasound did. There is something HUGE to be said for that! I am eternally grateful for that.

Here's what I've decided: We will know the baby's birthdate (or at least when we schedule it), we will know two names (or more) BUT the one true surprise will be when the doctor announces if we have a boy or a girl. That will be exciting! It will. :) Pray for me...

Ultrasound #2

Above is Mr. Dax's lips, nose and just above his nose is his closed fist. He hid his face for the entire ultrasound but was more than happy to show that he's a boy! :) He's healthy and doing great! He's spread out the width of my belly in the breech position and seems to be quite comfortable there. :) Aren't those the cutest lips and sweetest nose!

So heard from the nurse at my Dr's office today and I still have the Complete Placenta Previa. It hasn't budged. I'll admit this time the nurses call actually brought tears to my eyes because even though I have made the C-section "okay" it's everything else that could go wrong that terrifies me and I really had it in the back of my head that my placenta would get out of the way and we'd be good to go. I'm still not having any complications from the previa but there is the possibility of bleeding at any time and if the bleeding can't be controlled then he would need to be delivered early. That scares me, I know that I am tough, I know I'll be okay but the idea of him coming before he's really ready is just not something I even want to consider. I'm already madly in love with this little boy and want the very best for him. So if that means bedrest at some point or anything else then that's what I'll do. Bedrest hasn't been mentioned by my Dr because I'm not having any complications but I am curious to know what he's going to say at the next appointment and I really want to know where we go from here. I know he won't be able to give me all the answers I want but a scenerio of what he sees happening would be great. I've read they take babies at 36-37 weeks with a previa so that's another one of my questions, when will this baby be born since we can kind of set a date at this point I think, guess I'll find out at the next appointment. My next Apt. is the 10th so I'll update this after that I guess or whenever I need a moment to vent. :) I do get ANOTHER ultrasound out of the deal too in 4-6 weeks to check things out again.

Okay so on with my belly picture... this is actually taken at 26 weeks, 6 days but we'll call it 27 weeks.

Because of Dax's position I seem to be getting wider instead of sticking out more. Mom commented tonight on how his position is causing me to be wider and my wonderful brother piped up and said he'd get me a wide load sticker if I need it. We all started laughing 'cause what else can you do- you only get to use material like that so often and frankly the only other people he could use it on would NOT appreciate his humor. I love my little brother and had anyone and I mean ANYONE else said that to me it probably would have made me cry but Bill just has a way of saying something like that with a big grin on his face and I just can't be mad at him. He's gonna be a great uncle---- or a dangerous one haha!