Light...

Well I was almost to the point of one blog per month.. course I don't know if ANYONE actually reads these but oh well it helps...

Dakota and me!

Can I just say I've found a light at the end of the tunnel? I am SO happy! Life is turning around, have a wonderful new boy in my life (more about him in at a later time), have been able to get out and do a lot of new activities as well as keep up with the old ones, test drove some new cars- now know what I am looking for, and I almost have enough $$ saved up to get into my own apartment! I am having the best time and am really, really LOVING life!

My Valentine!

So my new gripe... people who think they know what is best for me.. COME ON PEOPLE, its my life! If you want to be part of my life your job is to support me! If you don't agree with something I am doing or have done then voice your opinion and move on because I'm not about to change decisions in my life for you. It's my life (hey isn't this a theme from the last post?). My first reaction to criticism is of course to be angry because that's just the way I roll but in all honesty, it hurts to have certain people that are very close to me don't want to try and see what I see-- or hold me to my past. It's the past for a reason and we can't get it back... just keep moving forward and if I make mistakes then that' s my own doing and I will learn from them and grow stronger for them. Hmm is this coded enough for internet?? Ha ha! Can I just say that I have THE MOST AWESOME LITTLE BROTHER EVER! He is so great! All I had to do was call him and he sat on the phone with me and let me explode on him for about an hour! Siblings are great!

My other new issue... trying to split my time between family and friends... this is a hard one but I think I am doing a pretty good job. The problem now is people who are used to seeing me ALL the time are not as fond of seeing me some of the time. I have a life, my own life to live and that's what I'm doing.

Thank you to all of you who have given me a tremendous amount of support these last few months! I really appreciate your words of encouragement and your silence if you weren't sure you agreed with certain things. Sometimes silence is key. Love you guys!

I wasn't married, for crying out loud!

OKAY, so my new gripe (sp?) is people who seem to think I should be in mourning over my previous relationship. The last few weekends I have gotten to get out and have a ton of fun with some of my friends, met some new friends, and reconnected with old friends. This is what I think I should be doing, connecting with people, not sitting at home crying in my beer and pining for a relationship that would have never worked out.

HE and I were not married... it's not like we're going through a divorce that isn't final yet... I broke up with him, I moved out, I have been done for awhile now and I have every right (and so does he) to go out and have a great time! I came up with a new line this weekend: I feel like I've been on "pause" for 5 years, now I'm catching up. Truly, that's what it's felt like, a pause button on my life because the 5 years with him didn't REALLY go anywhere. Yes, I have learned A LOT of things about myself and about what I will and won't put up with but frankly I went from college student to housewife and missed being young me in there.

I don't know, maybe I'm complaining over nothing but it sure is annoying to hear that someone can't understand WHY I would want to go out and have a good time with my friends so soon after my break-up but ya know what... TOUGH LUCK, it's my life.

On a side note... it's been 1 month today and no thoughts of turning back!